A Horse Is A Horse, Of Course, Of Course

...and a man has a penis, and a woman has a vagina...which brings me to Chaz Bono and Thomas Beatie.

I don't care if they are lesbians.  I don't care if they want to wear men's clothing.  I don't care if they want to drive big trucks, grunt and fart, and grab their crotches and spit (classic male behavior).  But I DO care if they want to pretend that they have actually transformed into men.  I'm calling Bull on this one.

While these women have decided to take testosterone injections and remove their breasts, they do NOT wish to loose their female genitalia or reproductive organs.  They do however consider themselves completely transformed into men.  Sorry ladies, you can't have it both ways!!! 

They could say "I am living life as if I were a man" or "As far as anyone can see, I'm a man", but no.  Rather than admitting that they just prefer a masculine role in society, they actually believe that they have become men.  I don't know what Bono's legal status is, but Beatie is legally a man....who vaginally bore a child...WTF!  How does that make any sense to anyone?

Please take note of the following definitions from Merriam Webster:

Male:  an individual that produces small usually motile gametes (as spermatozoa or spermatozoids) which fertilize the eggs of a female.

Man:   an individual human; especially : an adult male human 

Masculine:   having qualities appropriate to or usually associated with a man

Now if these women decided to have gender reassignment surgery, I would gladly overlook the whole "motile gamete" thing and call them men.  A creatively constructed penis is as good as it will ever get for them, and I would say good luck with that Mr. Bono and Mr. Beatie.  But no!  Society has decided that testosterone and a mastectomy make one into a man.  What about women in menopause, or those who have lost their breasts to cancer?  Have these chics suddenly become dudes?

In short:  1) I am not homophobic...I don't care who they sleep with  2) Everyone has the right to be masculine or feminine regardless of their sex, but 3) Having a hoo-ha and a uterus means your a woman.

First Blog Ever!!!!!

That's right kids!  I'm doing it!  I'm finally writing down all of the random thoughts and exciting events that shape my life.  While most posts will revolve around current experiences, there will be a smattering of older stories just waiting to be told.  Also, I will probably write as if I were talking, so please prepare yourself to endure a myriad of spelling and grammatical mistakes.

Why did I name this blog Chicken Fried Steak Ain't Chicken?  1) Because I wanted to get the word out, 2) because I feel that it's more believable when phrased in "the language of the people", and 3) because Molly would probably be mad at me if didn't.  (Molly's name has not been changed because she is not innocent and needs no protection.) 

My obsession with CFS began a few years ago while working at a fabulous steak house back home in Arkansas.  The CFS at this particular restaurant was very popular.  It was deep fried to perfection.  It was smothered in gravy.  It was delicious.  It was BEEF!!!!  It never ceased to amaze me how many people not only didn't know this, but would actually argue with me about it.  It seems like such a small thing to bother a person, but toward the end of a double shift riddled with peanut shells, teenage drama, and screaming children a CFS argument was enough to make to make me want to just end it all by way of dumpster fire.  I thought when I moved to Louisiana to go to vet school I would be leaving those days of ignorant bliss far behind, but lo and behold CFS found a way to haunt me once again. 

It is a well known fact that Molly doesn't eat beef, so when she sat down in the cafeteria with a golden brown slab of CFS (I could spot one from outer space) I was puzzled.
Me:  What cha eatin?
Molly:  Chicken.
Me:  Uhm, thats Chicken Fried Steak.
Molly:  I asked the lady.  She said it was chicken.

Dear God!  No one knows that this is freaking cow!  It's brown and it smells and tastes like beef!  Are you freaking kidding me!!!  I don't hold this against Molly, of course.  Being only loosely carnivoris, she is not expected to know her cuts of meat, but the person who prepared this and read the box in the freezer it came out of...the one that said STEAK...should know what animal this processed food product came from.  To matters worse, when we repeated this story to several classmates, they didn't know what it was either!!!!

So help me out here people and spread the word....Chicken Fried Steak Ain't Chicken!!!